Category Archives: Street Shots

Has Luxury shopping LOST its LUXury?

I recently sat down with friends for lunch, most of whom are in luxury retail. We got on the subject of this past holiday season, and what it was like- busy, good customers, making money, etc. But what dominated the conversation was actually the topic of the “customers”. Now to clarify, there are “Clients”: (those who are repeat shoppers who work one-on-one with their Sales Associate, and generally spend more money than the average shopper- THEY ARE GOOD!). The “customers” are the “one-time-buyer”, who is NOT (yet, or ever will be) a client, and usually shopping in a place CLEARLY out of their league.  Some of these stories I heard made me realize that: A) there are some REALLY stupid people out there, B) the English language & grammar is finished (as we know it); C) LuAnn De Lesseps song sings true: “Money Can’t Buy You Class”.


A woman came into a Luxury store, looked at some men’s loafers, and asked the Salesperson, “it says (brand) here, but it doesn’t say “made-in-Italy” anywhere”. The Salesperson replied, “yes, you’re right. Actually none of the Men’s shoes say that.” She replied, “But some of the Women’s do?”. The salesperson responded, “correct, some of the Women’s Collection Shoes do say it.” She takes a moment to think about it, then says,” well…. are these… copies?” (REALLY LADY??!?!?!?!!? You’re IN the ACTUAL STORE and you’re asking if they are REAL?!?!?!?!)  The Salesperson said, “Excuse me, you are in a (brand) store- we don’t sell copies.” DAMN GOOD ANSWER! Tell her to GET OUT!) Another friend said that if it were him, he would have loved to mock her, and say, “oh yes, these are copies. We have such a high demand, that we can’t make enough; so we get copies made in China and sell them under our own roof.” (GOD,  I WISH I COULD HAVE SEEN THAT HAPPEN).

Story 1.5 (more stupidity)

A woman comes into a Luxury store’s shoe department. She asks,”are you having sale?” Salesperson says, “yes, all sale shoes are in this section here.” The customer walks over to a completely different shoe section and asks, “are these on sale?” Sales associate, “No, only these shoes here.” (pointing back to the sale section just shown). Customer asks, “So these aren’t on sale then?” ( NO !!!! THOSE AREN’T ON SALE!!! OTHERWISE THEY’D BE IN THE SALE AREA!!!!!)

PART 2- THE END OF PROPER GRAMMAR (… and more Stupidity)

A woman walks in to a luxury store, and says,” you don’t got any red bags?”     THE CORRECT QUESTION WOULD BE, “Do you have any red bags?”.

Person walks into a luxury store. Salesperson greets with a smile and says, “Hello!” Customer responds with, “I’m just looking.”  My favorite Salesperson response to that? Salesperson, “and I’m just saying hello…”

A man picks up a black display shoe and asks,”what color is this?” The salesperson responds, “It’s Black”. The customer says, “Is it? It looks Navy. Are you sure it’s not Navy?” The Sales Associate (WHO KNOWS WHAT COLOR IT IS- HI, THEY WORK THERE) responds, “Yes, I’m sure. It only comes in Black”. The Customer: “Oh yeah, it is.  I’m looking for black, just wanted to make sure.” Then a pause, “You don’t have this in Navy?” (NO THEY DON’T HAVE IT IN NAVY!!!!!)  Salesperson says, “no, like I said, it only comes in black.” Customer asks, “you don’t have my size?” Sales associate says, ” I don’t know, you haven’t told me your size.” (THESE “CUSTOMERS” ARE SO STUPID!!!!) Then the customer asks, “well, what size is this?”  The salesperson takes shoe, looks at size, and replies, “It is an 8”. The Customer says, “that’s not my size”.  Associate has to ask, “well, what size do you want?” The customer answers, “I need a 10”. (DUH YOU F***ING IDIOT!!!!!!! JUST TELL THE SALESPERSON WHAT SIZE YOU WANT IN WHAT SHOE!!!!!!!! IT’S ACTUALLY VERY EASY!!!!! ALL THAT STUPID CONVERSATION FOR NOTHING!!!!!)

Woman walks in to luxury store, asks, “Where are your wallets?” Salesperson replies, “They are in all the cases here. Are you looking for a specific color?” Customer answers, “no, just looking…. can I see this black one?” Salesperson shows it to her. Customer asks, “what other colors does it come in?” Salesperson responds, “grey and blue.” The customer asks, “you don’t have it in pink?” (IF SHE HAD IT IN PINK, DON’T YOU THINK SHE WOULD HAVE TOLD YOU??????) Customer then says,” I really want a bright color wallet.” (THEN WHAT ARE YOU DOING LOOKING AT A BLACK WALLET??? THE SALESPERSON ASKED IF YOU WERE LOOKING FOR A PARTICULAR COLOR!!!!)

When people ask, “you don’t have this..?.” , or “you don’t “got” this..?”, (GROSS) or “you don’t carry…?” ALREADY SETS THE TONE in a NEGATIVE manner, and having the salesperson NOT want to help you. (ie: you are “setting self up for confirmation of disappointment and failure”). The correct way to ask for something would be, “DO you have this…?” or, “DO you carry…?” Asking in a positive manner would be more engaging in having the Salesperson WANTING to help you!

PART 3- “Money Can’t Buy You Class”

This last part will probably anger people, but hey- I’m writing what I see and hear.

Recently, during my shopping excursions/outings/researching, I have noticed more and more….how shall I put this…. “conflicting demographics” in luxury stores.  On one side of the boutique is an upscale Jewish family, wife carrying a $12,000 Hermes; while on the other side is a bunch of “rapper wannabes” (Not an actual real successful rapper), with their pants hanging below their butts, underwear in complete exposure, Gucci belt, shoes; and smelling of marijuana. Or a young Korean couple shopping, the lady done up in a Chanel jacket,  jeans, and Louboutins; while a group of Middle Americans, overweight with dyed hair, piercings, (and clearly a decade behind in fashion), wander through the store, saying,” this store is so expensive, look how much this is, lets try things on”.


While there is a part of me that believes, “everyone is created equal”, … that’s where it stops. Created. Everyone WAS created equally- It’s what people have BECOME, what they have MADE OF THEMSELVES, how they REPRESENT THEMSELVES, that make me think they are not “equal”. Imagine you have gone through college, earned degrees, finally made a name for yourself, and can create a lifestyle you can afford. Like the Jewish/Hermes bag-woman, and the Korean couple: they have clearly made their mark, paid their dues, worked hard to get the things they want, or have inheirited a lifestyle that continues to involve themselves in a surrounding they appreciate and respect.

On the other hand, everyone can aspire to be someone, or be a better person, or want the “finer things in life” right? But how are we to take them seriously when they represent themselves in a place where, what they represent, does not in fact, belong? I can imagine a whole bunch of people telling me I’m too judgmental,  racist, stuck up, etc. Try this: the “rapper wannabes” I used for example? When I see this, I think, “What would Barack and Michelle Obama think? Or Oprah? They don’t dress like this. Would they be saddened to see their fellow race representing themselves like this?  Or do you think they would embrace the culture and think nothing of it?” I believe they would feel embarrassed, JUST the SAME way I WOULD , when those “Middle Americans” represent themselves the way they do, and people would think to put ME in that same category.

Luxury isn’t Luxury when the co-habitat of different groups of people are all of a sudden “fish-bowled”. It isn’t meant to be, for these groups to be shopping under the same roof together. Think of their living situations- Do they live in the same neighborhoods? NO. Do they eat at the same restaurants? NO.

Luxury is not luxury when anyone can just go in and buy it. You have to EARN IT, and RESPECT IT.


L.A. tries Hamptons Style: The 2nd Annual Veuve Cliquot Polo Classic

Yesterday was the 2nd Annual Veuve Cliquot Polo Classic, held at L.A.’s Will Rogers State Park. The combination of Polo and Champagne on a sunny day turned LA into the Hamptons. Or at least, the best attempt to be the Hamptons.

The dress code for this event was 1920’s-1930’2; “reminiscent of the original days of Polo”. The Hamptons have done this FOREVER, so the “old-money, old-world -style” know how to dress right. For the most part, this years attendees really made an effort, and got into the spirit of the event. I had a great time, and am DEFINITELY looking forward to next year!

For others- I hope they paid attention, and will come back next year and at least TRY. Here, I will show you CORRECT examples, and HORRIBLE attempts.

This girl ROCKED it. The bright and large hat, the light pleated full skirt, the vintage looking shoes, and small bag. PERFECTION. I loved her! (So did most guys, who couldn’t stop staring at her).

This girl also looked great. The oversized hat was perfect, small bag, and wedges. The sundress is a little “now”, but she gets an A for effort for sure!

Now take a look here. The 2 girls on the left: appropriate hats. The red Felt hat, the black with feathers…. and then this girl on the right: wearing a WOVEN STRAW CHINESE/VIETNAMESE HAT. How the hell does that make sense at a 1930’s themed Polo match??? NOPE, it DOESN’T.

This girl CLEARLY has no idea how to dress for Polo, let alone DAYTIME. Just because she threw on a hat doesn’t mean she’s “in” with the style. She was wearing a FULL ON SEE-THROUGH “dress” that looked like bedroom attire!!! Was she trying to go for the “VILLAGE SL*T” look? If so, then she nailed it.

These 2 women are also confused. The one on the left is dressed like a social- climber for a Beverly Hills “luncheon tea party” in a flowy maxi halter with crystals. Sure she may look “nice”, but how is this POLO wear?  This is, again, an example of Countess LuAnne’s song “Money can’t buy you class”. Look at her cheap-looking friend in a SKIN-TIGHT dress with a keyhole detail showing off her lower back tattoo! Wow, really classy… ps: they are about 40years old. NOT APPROPRIATE.

When it comes to correct footwear for the ladies, you SHOULD know, that when it comes to grass- you wear WEDGES, NOT HEELS. Look at this photo- THEY ARE ALL SUNK INTO THE DIRT! This is how your shoes get ruined! (not that these girls had to worry- they were definitely NOT Louboutins)! Clearly, they have never been to a daytime wedding, or an estate luncheon. NO HEELS IN THE GRASS!!!!!!

This guy had THE BEST outfit on BY FAR. The wingtip oxfords, with the high socks, cropped/tucked pants, fitted vest over his button-down, and a great argyle tie (unfortunately can’t be seen in this shot). He was even playing badminton. Perfect.

The Sweater Boys! I loved these guys who sat next to us- the all had on button downs, with collegiate-style sweaters tied over their shoulders. Their shirts were tucked in, and wore wingtips and loafers. This crew was VERY Hamptons.

Even this little kid was dressed up! So cute…(awwww). Apparently, his parents are ON TOP OF IT when it come to the “appropriateness” of themed dress. A gingham Ralph Lauren button down, (with sleeves cuffed!) and a bowtie?? Perfect!

Here are 2 jerks who didn’t care at all what they looked like for the event (and probably everyday as well, looking at this).  The guy on the left- JEANS??? The guy on the right- ill fitted polo, baggy shorts, and FLIP FLOPS??? Really guys- you couldn’t STEP IT UP for just ONE afternoon??? This is a Sunday Polo Match- not a football bbq. And not any Polo Match: The 2nd Annual Veuve Cliquot Polo Classic!!! Next year, the dress code should be more strict: I would DENY these 2 guys entry!

This guy missed the mark COMPLETELY!!!! He is dressed for a SAILING REGATTA! There is NO WATER here! Blue & white striped sweater with red shorts is NAUTICAL- NOT POLO!!! Get your themes straight before leaving the house next time…


These 3 “women”… I called them FAKES, pulled out cheap champagne from their backpacks and were drinking this, instead of the (always amazing) Veuve, which is PLENTIFUL at the event!!! Why may you ask? Because they didn’t want to pay for the expensive champagne…. We overheard these ladies BRAGGING that they “shoved it deep in their backpack, so it wouldn’t be found if searched, and [that they brought] a cheap bottle in case it was taken away.” SIGHHHH…….

There was a simple rule for this event- no outside liquor. Clearly, since the event is SPONSORED by VEUVE , the only alcohol available was Veuve (no problem with that!) Sure the prices were double what you could get in the grocery store (bottles: Yellow was $90, Rose was $110) but IF YOU CAN’T AFFORD IT, THEN YOU SHOULDN’T BE THERE!!!!  If you’re trying to live a lifestyle above your means, then STOP. You are just an EMBARRASSMENT to yourself!

I love that a woman next to me saw this happening and said, “that is SACRILEGE!”

BCBG = Bad Clothes (from) Better Garments !!!!!

I recently walked into the newly opened store in The Beverly Center, and was BLOWN AWAY!! Not from the store design (nice), not from the friendly staff (very nice), but from the MERCHANDISE THEY ARE SELLING AS DIRECT KNOCKOFFS OF OTHER DESIGNERS…. HARDCORE!!! This BCBG brand is no longer an originator in anything, whoever is “designing” (Max Azria?) is CLEARLY just copying things that SOMEONE ELSE HAS ALREADY MADE!

Just call the store “KNOCK OFF CENTRAL”! It’s one thing to copy YOUR OWN Herve Ledger dresses at a fraction of a cost for the aspiring coveters, but it’s quite another to SELL MERCHANDISE that are EXACT COPIES (and much cheaper looking) and call it YOUR DESIGNS!!! HOW EMBARRASSING…

Here are my EXACT EXAMPLES of BCBG’s FORGERY off DESIGNERS! (I’m going to start with accessories… wait till you see the clothes and shoes!)

First we have Louis Vuitton:

Louis Vuitton cuff




Next up: HERMES

THE FAMOUS Hermes cuff - the "Collier de chien"

BCBG Knockoff

Hermes Espionne Ring




Now onto YSL…

YSL Postcard collection... bags, clutches, wallets...

BCBG (way cheaper looking) KNOCKOFF



How about MISSONI??

A REAL Missoni

BCBG Knockoff in STORE!



Prada’s turn….

PRADA skirt, F/W 2010 - color-blocking trendstarter

BCBG KNOCKOFF - a season later, EXACT COLORS ... their S/S 2011




Prada Sequin Clutch

Prada Sequin Clutch

Prada Sequin Clutches




Shamefully…. Christian Louboutin

The Louboutin Spike that started it all....

Another Louboutin version....





And last, but not least…. Gianmarco Lorenzi. AMAZING shoes.

Gianmarco Lorenzi / Swarovski Crystal Snake shoe



So what did we learn here today? That YES, you can get the “look for less”…

But DIRECT COPYING is HORRIBLE. Imagine you’re at a party, and you’re wearing that “Missoni copy”, and everyone’s saying, “I LOVE your Missoni dress”. IMAGINE the GUILT you feel if you don’t correct them. Or the EMBARRASSMENT when you say, “No, It’s BCBG”, and they look at you like an IMPOSTOR. That Louis Vuitton cuff?? “Oh, no, it’s not really an LV…” So SAD!

The embarrassment…..

Re- DICK -ulous T-Shirts

I have received some readers photos recently, and have found that there is a part of America who STILL thinks BATHROOM HUMOR is funny (didn’t we all grow out of that by 6th grade?) and some who think that their “‘anti society’/anti ‘the- norm'” views means something (didn’t we ALSO stop doing that in junior high school?) I am mystified and plagued by the thought process that went into both A) the idiots who MADE these shirts, and B) the freaks who WEAR them.

Basically- if you see someone wearing a shirt that would go in this category- run. Run the other way, do not talk to them, do not catch their eye. They CLEARLY have issues.

Is this supposed to be funny? a license plate with i ❤ sav-on? I don’t understand. Really. Except whoever wears it must also be a REEAAAAAL Cheap ass, so ladies- don’t consider this guy worthy of dating. The most expensive date you’ll go on is Taco Bell.

And speaking of cheap asses:

Look at this winner! REAAALY??? And let’s see, what could MY response be? “AND ONLY FREAK ASS LOSERS WOULD WEAR THAT SHIRT!” It’s not that you have to buy expensive shirts (it’s nice to),  but you DEFINITELY don’t buy this “shirt” either!!! The type of person who would wear this is someone I know, who is so… “anti- government/conspiracy 9/11” and lives in a small WT town in northern Cali. He also would love that is has a skull, since he is a “metal-head” (gross) and listens to that Metallica crap… (isn’t that from the 80’s/early 90’s?)

Clearly the people who wear these things are A**HOLES!!!

And speaking of butts, check this out- and ACTUAL butt HOLE on a t-shirt:

Wow…. some guy is actually wearing a REAL A-HOLE on his BODY…. WTF is WRONG with PEOPLE out there???? 

WHERE DID YOU GO, PICK UP THIS SHIRT, and think, “THIS IS SO COOL, I HAVE TO HAVE IT!!” Why are you allowed in public??????? 

The following t-shirt I couldn’t take a real live photo of, it was on a FATHER who was out with his (estimated age) 4 year old son. Lucky(?) for me, I was able to google this (unfortunately) very easily:

A FATHER was wearing this…. IN PUBLIC… WITH his YOUNG CHILD. I have a message for that man, and any man who is thinking of having children: IF YOU WEAR THIS SHIRT, YOU SHOULD NOT BE A PARENT. What kind of message are you telling your child about how to treat others in life? That child will obviously have BAD parenting skills, HORRIBLE manners, and probably end up a WT loser…. That is a HORRIBLE thought, but most likely- true. DON’T WEAR THIS CRAP!!!!!!

And on a brighter, humorous side, I saw this shirt in a store in NYC:

I almost died inside laughing!!! Someone after my OWN HEART!!!!!

Of course I did NOT buy this, (I mean, really?) Even though it’s message is EVERYTHING I stand for, and actually, WOULD be funny coming from me- I do NOT wear STUPID SLOGAN SHIRTS. If I really did see this on someone, I would think, “YEAH, the SALES ASSOCIATE  who SOLD that to YOU!!”

Either way, whoever wears these shirts- the jokes on them…. not us.


“O, say can you see….”


O, I SEE alright….. I see YOUR F***ING G**DAMN UNDERWEAR!!!!


THIS IS NOT what are FOREFATHERS of AMERICA meant when the created the BILL OF RIGHTS in our country: BECAUSE THIS IS NOT RIGHT!!!!  THIS IS PUBLIC INDECENCY!!!! YOU’RE IN A MALL,  (the Beverly Center, of course) IN PUBLIC!!!!

These shorts were SOOOO LOW, that he had one hand on the belt (he clearly doesn’t know how to use) permanently holding his shorts as he walked…. W..T..F????????????  

And I DON’T want to hear that STUPID F***ING phrase : “It’s his SWAG..”



F*** SWAG! THAT’S NOT “SWAG”….. Swag is a Christmas decoration!


Here’s another one:

Is this supposed to be ATTRACTIVE???? Are girls/women/men supposed to be IMPRESSED????  



I DO WANT TO KNOW: WHAT GOES THROUGH THOSE BRAINS when they lo0k in the mirror when they’re getting (“dressed”) and say, “Yeah, I look good”… I WANT TO KNOW THIS!!!!


So, in closing: I hope everyone else got to enjoy sunshine, bbq, and fireworks on their 4th of July, while I enjoyed, seeing someone else’s WEDGIED, GHETTO-“SWAG” UNDERWEAR SAGGY-ASS  parading around.

Wow…what a way to show pride in yourself and country.

REAL MEN get PEDICURES… (beware the following pic!)

I went into a Chipotle the other day, was STARVING. Luckily, there wasn’t a long line. Only 2 guys in front of me.

Then I happened to look down…. and this is what I saw:

Of course it doesn’t do AS MUCH shock value here, but that SNAGGLE NAIL on the pinky toe was SO LONG it was CURVING, YELLOWED, and DISGUSTING.

It had probably not been clipped for at least a year!!!!!!!! The reason this closeup is so blurry is that I actually started GAGGING while looking at this… (God, I’m queasy just looking at this pic- I’m actually baking chicken now, and the smell of food and this picture are bringing horrid flashbacks)


GUYS: when you make the decision to wear sandals, CLIP UR F***ING TOENAILS!!!!! If you’re too “macho” (please..) to go get them taken care of professionally,  DO IT YOURSELF IN THE BATHROOM!!!!!

This guy had a Mercedes key clipped to his beltloop  (Hi, desperate for approval and attention anyone? Don’t clip ur keys to your belt lop unless you’re a janitor or security guard..thanks) So clearly he can afford EITHER nail clippers, or a $20 pedicure!

We’re in LA! The LAND of FLIP-FLOPS! Everyone knows to “clip the toes!” (my official new statement!)

Sorry readers, but I need to go throw up now…..

You know what they say about driving “Big Trucks”…..





So what does it mean when they INSTALL  SWINGING METAL “BALLS” on their truck??


I actually googled “truck balls”, …. and there was BULLBALLZ.COM, for “Truck Nutz”

There are different sizes, there are different colors. Here’s what they “BOAST” on their site:


We are and have been the Premium Manufacturer
Purveyor of Bulls Balls® And Big Boy Nuts since 1999 !


We are The Foremost Truck Balls Company in the World !